I am not sure if it is because of Father's Day... if it is just me being a girl... stress... lack of quality sleep... but I have been so close to tears in the past week or so it is crazy. I don't feel sad... in general. There are always moments of sadness in my day, there has been for several years now, but I don't feel depressed.
I miss my Dad... this I know is true. The reality as years go on that I won't see him again at least not for a long time... rips me apart. I know people get sick of hearing it, but it is the first time I have felt loss in its entirety. I felt loss when Deven's Dad passed a HUGE loss, but when it is someone whose blood courses through your veins it is way harder than I ever imagined.
I guess one of these days maybe I will figure it all out, but for now... I just keep wondering what the heck my own deal is... I can only imagine what the people around me must think!
